SpaceX Launch: What's the Schedule and Who Actually Cares?

So, another Falcon 9 launch, huh? Sentinel-6B this time, hauling its 3,175-pound self into orbit to measure sea levels. Like we don't have enough to worry about. I guess more data is always good, but give me a break. It's all part of the European Union's Copernicus program. Fine. They launched the first one, Sentinel-6 Michael Frelich, back in 2020.

The "Reuse" Celebration: Seriously?

SpaceX is patting itself on the back for its 500th orbital mission using a previously flown rocket booster. 500! Gwynne Shotwell even chimed in to congratulate the team. Yay. Look, I get it, reuse is cool, saves money, blah blah blah. But let's be real, it's not exactly new anymore, is it? This particular booster had already flown twice before for Starlink missions. Three flights? That's their big achievement? It's like celebrating your 3rd time eating a sandwich.

And they call this progress?

The Falcon 9 first stage landed back at Vandenberg about nine minutes after liftoff, all nice and tidy. Good for them. Sentinel-6B got deployed about 57 minutes after launch at an altitude of 1,322 kilometers. Okay. It's supposed to work with its predecessor for cross-calibration during its first year. Whatever.

Where's the Real Innovation?

All this talk about Falcon 9, and what about Starship? Yeah, it's launched 11 times, but all suborbital test flights. Suborbital! Like a really expensive, really explosive paper airplane. They don't even count towards the 500 mission milestone. Why? Because they keep blowing up!

They want us to be impressed with reusable stages when they can't even get the whole damn thing to stay in one piece. It's like bragging about your fuel-efficient car when you can't manage to drive it without crashing into a tree. The hype is so thick you can cut it with a knife. I mean, seriously, is anyone still buying this?

Oh, and the satellite itself? It's carrying a radar altimeter from ESA and a NASA microwave radiometer. Sounds fancy, I guess. But at the end of the day, it's just measuring how screwed we are with rising sea levels. According to Copernicus data, they've risen almost 10 cm in the past 25 years. Thanks for the reminder. Maybe I should buy some beachfront property... in Denver.

The Inevitable Environmental Tangent (Because Why Not?)

Speaking of the environment... All these rocket launches. All that fuel. All that carbon. Are we sure this is helping things? I mean, shouldn't we be focusing on, I don't know, not launching giant metal tubes into the atmosphere every other day? But no, gotta get those satellites up there. Gotta have that sweet, sweet data. Gotta track those rising sea levels in ultra-high definition. Because that'll solve everything.

Offcourse, I'm just a cranky internet commenter. What do I know?

Wake Me Up When They Land on Mars

So, another launch. Another satellite. Another pat on the back for doing the bare minimum. I'll be impressed when SpaceX actually delivers on its promises. When Starship isn't a glorified firework. When we're actually colonizing Mars instead of just measuring how much the ocean is going to swallow Miami. Until then, it's just noise.